I woke up before anyone else in the house, my mind racing with a million thoughts. The sun had barely started to rise over the mountains, casting a soft glow over the scenery before me. I lit a cigarette and took a deep drag, feeling the nicotine hit my lungs and calm my nerves. It was hard not to be consumed by the failures that had brought me here, to this beautiful property in Pennsylvania with my in-laws and friends. But for a moment, I could forget it all and just be. The only sound was the rustling of leaves and the gentle chirping of birds. I had been trying to fill the gap of revenue lost from my failed job in Merchant Cash Advances by freelancing, but it wasn’t enough. I took another drag of my cigarette and glanced around the balcony, bottles of liquor strewn about from the night before. It was a stark reminder of my self-destructive tendencies, but I couldn’t let it get to me. Brenna’s belly was growing by the second, and we had recently found out we were having a girl. Alenna Angela, a tribute to my sister Angie. I missed her every day, but in a way, this new life growing inside Brenna was a chance for redemption. I needed to distract myself from my own anxiety, so I grabbed my laptop and started typing away. I had an idea for a short horror movie called “Brenda’s Baby,” and I wanted to write the script before anyone else in the cabin woke up, as I would pitch it to them the moment I saw them arise. It was silly, but it was a reminder of my creative power, and it kept me occupied. As I sipped my coffee and typed away, the characters started to come to life in my mind. I typed furiously, letting the words flow out of me. The story was terrible, but I didn’t care. It was a distraction, a way to keep myself from falling deeper into despair. As I finished the script, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction. It was something, at least. A small victory in a sea of failures. I closed my laptop and took one last drag from my cigarette before stubbing it out. The sun was fully risen now, and the cabin was starting to come to life. It was time to face the day, but for a brief moment, I had found some peace.
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