Something Big Is Coming

Once we were back in New York City, it was business as usual. The daily hustle and bustle that was our daily schedule were back in full effect, but the lingering thoughts of our San Diego trip remained prominently on my mind. I needed to find a way to tell my story. I needed to know that if anything happened to me, my daughter would have the ability to look through my history and know the good and bad choices that defined my existence. I found myself in front of my computer, diving deep into the realms of my old YouTube accounts. There it was – the extensive archive of content I had created over the 20+ years I had dedicated to my artistry. I began combing through the endless list of videos, each one a piece of the mosaic that made up my life. It was fascinating and terrifying, all at once. As I clicked through the videos, I was hit with a tsunami of emotions. The screen flickered with memories of my younger self, my journey through music, the laughter and tears of friends and family, and the countless moments of pure, unadulterated passion. I watched as Morning View, my Incubus tribute band, brought life to the stage. I smiled at the banter between Zo and me during the Bud and Roach Show and relived the adrenaline rush of performing solo through the hole-in-the-wall circuit. I was drowning in a sea of memories, feeling the weight of my past pressing down on me. The task of organizing and making sense of it all seemed insurmountable. But then, as if summoned by divine intervention, the words of George Costanza, a character I had watched countless times on Seinfeld, echoed in my mind: “If you take everything I’ve ever done and condense it down to one day, it looks decent.” That simple mantra became my lifeline. I held onto it, using it as a beacon to guide me through the overwhelming task before me. I found solace in those words, and they gave me the strength to push forward, one video at a time. This archive of my life, this digital tapestry that I had been weaving for decades, was the key. It was the foundation upon which I would build my legacy. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was on the precipice of something monumental. A wave of change was looming on the horizon, and I knew I had to be ready to ride it when it arrived. So, I pressed on, emboldened by the knowledge that every video, every memory, every triumph, and every failure had led me to this moment.