Shade45: The Final Days

The morning after Nicole passed, I received a call from her family. They had been making arrangements for her memorial service and didn’t want the general public to know the details just yet. They asked me to put out a blanket statement on their behalf, thanking everyone for their sympathy during this difficult time. As I agreed to their request, they also asked me to write a eulogy for Nicole. It was at that moment that the reality of the situation hit me like a ton of bricks. Nicole was gone, and there was nothing I could do about it. I felt completely broken, and I knew that I had reached a turning point in my life. The night before, I had made a mess of the wedding, and I knew my days at Shade 45 were over. Even if they wanted me back, I couldn’t get myself to go through that again. I needed a change, and I needed it now. Brenna, who was housesitting in Long Island at the time, sent me an address to come and meet her. When I arrived, I immediately laid my head on her lap and wept. I couldn’t hold back the torrent of emotions that were flooding through me. The guilt, the regret, the sadness – it was all too much to bear. As I stared up at the ceiling above Brenna’s head, I began to lose myself in the memories of the life I had built up until that point. It was a rollercoaster of achievements and regrets, but it was the life I had lived. As I continued to reflect on my past, I knew I couldn’t continue on this path. I needed to make a change, not just for me, but for my family and friends who had supported me throughout the years. “Nicole would’ve gotten the right treatment had I been rich and famous already.” I had always believed that I was destined for greatness, but I had let my demons get in the way. As I wiped away the tears and took a deep breath, I knew that this was the beginning of a new chapter in my life. It wouldn’t be easy, and there would be setbacks along the way, but I was ready to face it all head-on.

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