Learning HTML Out Of Spite

As my voice and guitar chops grew, so did my ego. I started to take notice that I could do things people around me couldn’t do. Music became my weapon, and I wielded it with pride. In the dimly lit bathroom at church, where teens would gather to talk trash and make plans, I’d throw my weight around to anyone who challenged me. The echo of our voices would bounce off the cold, tiled walls, while I felt invincible with every argument I won. There was one person in particular who tried to intellectually undermine me in front of my crew. Let’s call him Tiko, and he had a real chip on his shoulder. With a smug expression on his face, he would often brag about things he was learning, particularly in the realm of technology. The gleam in his eye and the arrogance in his tone were enough to boil my blood. Having spent a considerable amount of my time learning about computers, I knew I had to exact my revenge in ways only a true nerd could do. I returned to the library of my school, the scent of aging books filling the air, and found a how-to guide on HTML. After familiarizing myself with the language, I created a website that would mock the very essence of Tiko’s existence. He was older, taller, and stronger than I was, but I was smarter and funnier, and that’s all that mattered to me. I started with simple HTML tags, creating the core of a basic website. The words and symbols on the screen seemed like a secret code, giving me a sense of power. There was no internet in my home at this time, so hand-coding in notepad and previewing each edit on the Internet Explorer browser was all I could do. Nonetheless, I drew a picture of Tiko, his sneering face frozen in time, and plastered it on the left side of a two-column table. Determined to humiliate him, I set a marquee tag for a transparent PNG of a dick to enter his mouth every five seconds. The animation was crude but effective, and I couldn’t help but laugh at my creation. This act of revenge set off a technological war between Tiko and me that would span years. Our “frenemy” type relationship was a constant battle of one-upmanship. In hindsight, though, our rivalry expanded my skillset in return. I became more proficient in HTML, and eventually delved into more advanced programming languages. The adrenaline-fueled thrill of our confrontations pushed me to become better and more innovative, as I refused to back down.