These days, it feels like I’m constantly riding a roller coaster of emotions, soaring high one moment only to plunge into darkness the next. It’s as if each fleeting moment of happiness is shadowed by an impending storm of depression, and I’ve grown almost accustomed to the impending crash, even when I find myself in a state of bliss. Father’s Day arrived, and while it should have been a day of relaxation, it turned out to be a bittersweet reminder of the challenges I face. Despite spending the entire day working, my wife graciously took charge of things at home, granting me the rare opportunity to focus on whatever I desired without any distractions. I immersed myself in my passion, dedicating a solid eight hours in front of the computer, revamping and catching up on Sunday Night Screenings. It was an achievement, a moment of accomplishment. But as the night wore on, reality barged in uninvited, eager to remind me of the financial struggles that plagued my life. The dreaded emails flooded my inbox, each one a harsh reminder of missed payments and mounting debts. Living paycheck to paycheck is stressful enough, but when those paychecks arrive unpredictably, the anxiety becomes all-consuming. Most of my work comes in the form of 1099 contracts, with the big, lucrative projects few and far between. This sporadic influx of income leaves me teetering on the precipice of poverty, a constant reminder of the long road ahead. The arduous journey I’ve embarked on with Global Domination Productions and Purfek Storm is a long-term play, a calculated gamble on the entertainment industry’s promise of success. I’m well aware of the tremendous opportunities that lie ahead, but the fact remains that I haven’t fully transitioned away from traditional employment. Instead, I find myself relying on sporadic freelancing gigs to make ends meet. It’s a jarring reality that serves as a stark reminder of how far I still have to go before I can breathe easily. I try my best not to let the stress consume me, fully aware of the potential consequences it could have on everything I’ve built. I strive to manage my expectations, to keep my sights set on the bigger picture. But as the school year comes to an end for my daughter, the looming summer presents a new set of challenges. With no cushion of solitude during the day to dive into my work, I find myself sinking deeper into the mire than I have in quite some time. I’m treading water, struggling to stay afloat amidst the overwhelming pressure threatening to drown me. At this moment, I’m confronted with the harsh reality of my circumstances, both financial and personal. Yet, I refuse to succumb to the depths of despair. The fire within me burns bright, reminding me of the unwavering belief I hold onto—that I am destined for greatness. I may be knee-deep in the muck right now, but I am determined to rise above it, to overcome every obstacle in my path. It’s in these moments of struggle that my resolve is tested, and I find solace in the knowledge that the darkest nights often precede the brightest days.

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