Alone All The Time

It was as if I had been thrown back in time, once again imprisoned in the same place that I thought I had escaped. I found myself sleeping on a mattress on the floor, upstairs, just as I had when I first moved into the building. As I lay there, staring up at the ceiling that seemed to close in on me with each passing moment, I couldn’t help but feel the crushing weight of despair enveloping me. The walls, adorned with chipped paint, seemed to mock me, taunting me with the bitter reminder that I was still stuck in a never-ending cycle. The dim light that managed to seep in through the cracks in the blinds cast eerie shadows on the floor, and the only sound that kept me company was the distant hum of the city outside. Just a week earlier, I had been on top of the world – a man reborn, feeling as if I had finally conquered my demons and taken control of my destiny. But now, with the Buildings Department breathing down my landlord and employer’s neck, the future seemed more uncertain than ever. The constant back and forth between the second floor and the basement had taken its toll on me, both physically and emotionally. My living situation was anything but stable, and it felt as though the progress I had made in my life was slipping through my fingers like sand. My belongings, once neatly arranged in my room, now lay scattered across the basement floor – a visual representation of the chaos that reigned within my mind. The cold, damp air that surrounded me seemed to seep into my very bones, chilling me to the core and leaving me feeling as if I were drowning in a sea of darkness. As I lay there, alone in the dark room, I couldn’t help but reflect on the rollercoaster of emotions that had defined my life. The highs were intoxicating, filling me with a sense of euphoria and invincibility that made me feel as if I could conquer the world. But the lows – oh, the lows were devastating. They were like a tidal wave of despair that threatened to swallow me whole, leaving me gasping for air and desperate for a lifeline.