As the pressure of doing the Bud and Roach Show mounted and depression from losing our AM radio show set in, my wife Brenna and I found ourselves arguing all the time. Unfortunately, my constant drunkenness didn’t help matters, and I would often come home long after I left work. Despite all the turmoil, I had a gig at The Bitter End, an iconic New York City venue, that I had booked. Everyone I expected to see was in attendance except for Brenna, who had moved back in with her family. Our relationship was estranged, and I didn’t blame her. I had nothing, yet I was still chasing fame. That night, I met Nicole Morris, aka NOE, who had already heard about me through industry friends. My reputation preceded me, and the energy was electric. NOE was an artist too, and we found ourselves immediately discussing our creative visions. It was clear we were going to work together in the future. The gig went well, and I was pleased with my performance, but my thoughts were consumed with Brenna. I didn’t know what to do to fix things, and I couldn’t help but wonder if I was just chasing a dream. Nonetheless, I had to continue forward because giving up wasn’t an option. The weight of the world was on my shoulders, but at that moment, I found solace in the knowing there were people in the world who wanted the limelight as bad as I did. NOE was one of the few people who saw me how I saw myself, as a future celebrity, and she made her belief in me known from the very beginning. I knew I couldn’t change the past, but I could shape my future, and that was the only thing that mattered at that moment.
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